Wednesday, January 27, 2010

New Years Pics
















Finally, some pics from New Years!

Friday, January 8, 2010

Sakartvelo On My Mind

(note: This blog is supposed to include pictures, but somewhere between my computer and this one the pictures disappeared off my flash drive. Still, I feel compelled to post something about my amazing adventure in the land called Sakartvelo...pics will come later.)

So, as some of you may know I spent my New Year's holiday in Tbilisi, Georgia. Some of you may also be aware that Tbilisi is not, in fact, a suburb of Atlanta. It is the capital of a small country in the South Caucasus, crammed in between Russia, Azerbaijan, Armenia and the Black Sea. It is also, in my opinion, the most awesome city in the world. As far as Caucasian cities go, it puts Baku to shame in just about every aspect imaginable. Since I'm currently a resident of Azerbaijan I'm not allowed to go to Armenia, but I imagine that Yerevan is probably about the same as Baku. Tbilisi, however, is about as amazing as a city can get.

The city itself is old...really, really, really OLD. There are castles and old churches sitting atop mountains scattered all across the city. The bulk of the city is centered in a valley through which a river runs, and travelling to any point in the city usually involves crossing the river at least once. This is a good thing, as there are countless examples of ancient and modern architecture, art, churches and all kinds of other stuff to see everywhere in the city. It is a bad thing because Georgians drive with an insanely homicidal lack of concern for pedestrians, traffic or themselves. I thought driving was bad in Azerbaijan, but Tbilisi takes the cake. Things like lanes, sidewalks, crosswalks and traffic signals have about as much tangible meaning to a Georgian driver as a Pollock painting does to a colorblind schizophrenic. Fortunately I managed not to become reduced to a greasy spot on Rustaveli Avenue, thanks in part to the fact that the local authorities had the foresight to shut it down prior to it being absolutely overrun by holiday revelers.

New Years itself was insanity. Imagine a frenzied warzone of wine-fueled partying, plus fireworks, clowns, puppeteers and concerts on every corner. After a while I just accepted that I was going to hear anything for the rest of the night after the 10th M-80 went off about 3 feet from my ear. In fact, I remember towards the end of the night people were throwing fireworks directly at my feet, my friends warning me "KEVIN GET THE HELL OUT OF THE WAY!" and me just walking on. I don't think I would do well in war, because after so many huge bangs in my general vicinity I tend to just ignore them. The whole night was amazingly fun, by far the best New Year's I've ever had.

Being a huge language dork, one of the most appealing parts of Georgia was their strange, almost unearthly language. Apparently named for Saint George in most other languages, the Georgian name for Georgia is "Sakartvelo". The Georgian name for Georgian is "Kartuli". I assume that whoever gave it the name Georgia probably did so because he couldn't understand what in the hell Georgians were saying to him. The Georgian language is ancient, and completely unique. The script, which Georgians claim was designed from the bends and curves of grape vines (it is, after all, one of the oldest wine making countries on earth), has been described by my fellow PC volunteers as either "The Language of Mordor" or wet spaghetti thrown on a wall. The language itself has enough consonant clusters and glottal stops to make a Klignon shudder. I know it's a very old language and that Georgians are very proud of it as a distinguishing feature of their heritage and culture, but really it just seems like a secret code they keep to annoy outsiders. When I was buying wine in a store, standing around looking like an idiot with a backpack on, some girl came up to me and started speaking Georgian and I almost wanted to scream. In an iconography shop some dude came up to me and started talking, without allowing me to interrupt, for about 5 minutes, before I managed to blurt out the only full sentence I know in Georgian: "Ar vitsi Kartuli", I don't speak Georgian. Also, my Russian has fallen into such a reprehensible state of disuse that every time I wanted to speak it I ended up speaking what I refer to as "Bakinese", namely the weird pidgin language that people in Baku speak that is a combo of Azeri, Russian, English and nonsense. Overall, I managed to get around fine, though not without feeling like an idiot every time I thought of a sentence in Russian and immediately said it in Azeri.

Overall, the best part of Georgia was just that, Georgia. It's so completely different from Azerbaijan that it's hard to believe that they exist right next to each other. Crossing the Azeri-Georgian border is like crossing from Mexico to the United States. And Georgians have such amazing things, like a working, democratic government, an uncorrupt police force, a non-oppressive, virtually equal culture, and really, really good wine. Azerbaijan is the polar opposite of all of these. In fact, it is pretty much agreed by every PCV in Azerbaijan that Georgia is paradise on earth, because after being here for so long and then travelling there it really does seem that way. The taxi driver who took us from the border to Tbilisi actually stopped and bought us all mandarins and coffee. The driver who took us from the border to Ujar overcharged me for my ride and kept putting his hand on Marina's leg. The apartment we stayed in cost less than a crappy hotel room in Baku, was a really nice place and in a decent part of town. The last time I stayed in Baku and payed for it my door had a hole in it and there was no running water. The people we met in shops were helpful, cheerful, and fun. People in Azerbaijan always look like they wish the world would end soon. In fact, Georgians buy their natural gas from Azerbaijan, but it is actually MORE EXPENSIVE here than there.

If there is any good reason for me to have my blog blocked besides the beauracratic nosiness of the American government it is this: Georgia is better than Azerbaijan, period. All the positive things I could say about Azerbaijan also apply there, but very few of the negatives.

Stay tuned for some pictures when I get time. Nakhvamdis (Goodbye, Georgian style!)